there was once a boy having a shower with his dad then he slipped and grabed his dads penis,then the dad said if you were having a shower with your mum what would have held on to.
By: Sirine khoury
there is a black vegetable in the salad.What is it?a TOMATO.but if i say to u that it's red u'll quicklly know the answer.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
yo mama was so stupid, that she sat on the tv and she watched the sofa
Why did the homsi wear condoms on his ears?
- So he wouldn't get hearing aids.
By: KING ELI
There was an accident on the street,, so many people were around to see this accident that the victim had died right away due to the injuries... a journalist is around trying to get his first story..so he want to get by the packed people serounding the vehicle, so he comes up with a good plan.. he said( excuse me please...The victim is my father)...when he got there..the VICTIM was a DONKey....hhhh
A homsi booked a room in a hotel
The hotel employee carried the bags and asked to take him to the room.
Once the door is opened,
The homsi stopped, shook his head and said to the employee:
"Listen its true that I'm a stranger to this country but this
doesn't mean that you fool me and laugh at me,
I've paid over $100 for renting a nice room. This room is too
small, has no window, no bathroom and it also contains no bed...!
The hotel employee politely said: "I'm sorry sir.
This is not your room, this is the elevator...
Homsi found cigarettes in daughter’s room, said: oh God! She smokes!
Then found rum, said: oh God! She drinks.
Then he found condoms,said:oh god she has penis
a homsi to a girl: i want to marry you.
girl: but i'm a year older than you
homsi: OK, i'll marry you next year!
By: Anti Crime
A husband said to his wife, "I will take a photo of your breasts and frame it ."
The wife said to her husband, "I will take a photo of your penis and enlarge it."
A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner, she would like to have sex with him for the first time.
The boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacy to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about half an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy a 3-pack, 10-pack or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents! Come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"
One day, a blonde left work early to go home and suprise her husband with a big dinner. When she got home she saw her husband's car in the drive way and thought "Aw, shoot there goes my suprise."
When she got inside, she heard something coming from her bedroom. She looked in and saw her husband humping her sister.
She ran out of her house and went to a sporting goods store. After buying a gun she went home and ran into her backyard. She pulled out her gun put it to her head and let out a shrill scream.
Her husband ran outside and saw his wife with the gun and said, "Honey, please don't do it!"
The blonde screamed, "Shut up asshole, you're next!"
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore the door off of the driver's side. The counselor immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up.
Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.
When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.
"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."
"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.
The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."
"Ahhh!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex!"
A blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if the store carries extra-large condoms. “Yes we do,” he says. “Would you like to buy some?” “No,” she replies. “But do you mind if I wait around until someone does?”
What is the perfect wife?
A good-looking, sex-starved chef who owns a liquor store.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
A: She missed.